The Afterlife...

About four years ago, when I announced that I was going to get married, my friends were very sympathetic… They told me, “Buddy, you’re dead!” Going by those words, I’m already in my afterlife, and I’m enjoying every moment of it! I wouldn’t have had it any other way… I have a beautiful, supportive, and intelligent wife, who’s adapted very well with the lifestyle change that marriage to someone like me would have warranted. And keeping my side of the bargain, I’ve been ‘domesticated’ enough to start living in a home. I still have a long way to go and I’ll get there… someday…

But what prompted me to write about marriage is this. Chiranjeevi’s daughter, Srija, elopes with her boyfriend of four years and seeks police protection from her family! Now the only reservation that the family could have had was the criminal history of their new son-in-law. But the 19-year old has managed to turn it into a media circus, what with the event being covered live and later, sitting in for a call-in program on national television answering questions and basking in congratulatory messages from equally juvenile callers.

The only thing that comes to my mind is that the constitution should be revised to not allow anyone with an IQ score lower than 90 to get married. With that, we will not have a dumb kid, taking the pants off her family on national television… ever! Sirish Braradwaj, you are a dead man! This man has bit off more than he can chew, and his afterlife don’t look good to me L Come on! This guy knew her for four freakin’ years! No prizes for what’s going to happen within the next four years…

The reason I mentioned IQ, was because it’s easier to measure than intellectual maturity. Some people mature fast, some normally and some don’t. My younger sister was intellectually mature when she was 10! I reached there sometime when I was 25. Let me try and put this in perspective here. Answer the following question:

You are in the final year of college. On your birthday, your father promised to buy to a PlayStation 3. He buys you a computer instead. What do you do?
a) Accept the gift graciously. Afterall, you can still play games on it :)
b) Cry and throw a tantrum till dad buys you the PlayStation.
c) Go postal and break the computer. You wanted a PlayStation, for cryin’ out loud!
d) Get the message that your dad wants you to study, not play around. Top your class.

Now compare your answer:
a) 5 points. You have the maturity of ‘The Walker’. Keep Walking :)
b) 0 points. You are as mature as Srija or Karunanidhi. See a Psychiatrist.
c) –15 points. You are comparable to Ted Bundy or Osama. Shooot yourself!
d) 10 points. You are intellectually on par with my younger sis. Apply for Mensa.

See what I mean. So, for all you guys, please come back here and take this test when you are required to take an ‘intellectually mature’ decision. Needless to say, you need to score 5 or 10. If you do score well, you can expect a reasonably good life in your afterlife.